Much like our 12 Guys You Date in Denver listthese are not meant to be taken seriously by anyone. A princess of the sleazy dating app, Tinderella is more of a catch than she knows.
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She will meet you for drinks in a heartbeat but will also dip out just as quickly. She likes to think that Tinder is not just for booty calls but…it is.
Easy come, easy go. Bun Head, photo courtesy of Taylor Marnie Hill. Also known as the Brunch Queen, the Bun Head has the same schedule every Sunday and the same hairstyle. She somehow balances the difficulty of having a sales job and getting absolutely hammered on the weekends with coworkers.
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The bun is as real as her love for mimosas. The Metal Chick is the suicide girl in training.
She is one of the coolest girls you can date in Denver. I mean, she looks like the coolest, which I am pretty sure is the goal.
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She almost always works at an unconventional place like a tattoo shop, a bar or a dispensary. She listens to Mastadon. What does it mean? She only has one eye, because her bangs cover the other one. A saggy beany and sweater separate the Hipster from the world.
Judging by her Tumblr, what we know is that the Hipster Chick is very beautiful and very sad. Hipster has a negative connotation in Denver — it has become like a curse word. Although, she does curse a lot. The female version of a LoDo Bro, the Bro Hoe is one of the most well-groomed and high maintenance of the girls you date in Denver.
She has expensive taste, and only goes to bars that have a 20 minute line out the door.
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Also known as the white girl with dread locks, the Hippy Chick really understands the importance and complexity of a good bead. She wears long skirts past the ankle that also double as a tapestry that she hangs on her wall usually. Hippy Chicks are really nice people but sometimes come off as rude or cold.
Be careful when standing behind a dancing Hippy Chick at a concert, for you run the risk of getting a dread in the mouth. The Gym Rat is in exceptional shape physically. She spends hours at the gym every day just to get that ass on fleek.
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She makes protein pancakes and posts photos of them on Instagram, yet seems to be relatively unaware that the pancakes look more like dog shit than food. She may participate in a body building competition, and if so, the Gym Rat goes to the tanning salon until she looks like an emaciated piece of fruit. Denver has more Cowgirls than meet the eye. More complex than the Gym Rat, the Yogi is about that yoga life.
She exclusively posts photos of yoga poses on Instagram with a dog always somewhere in the picture. Is yoga closer to an obsession than an actual sport? Natural Habitat: Awaken Gymnastics, on a rooftop somewhere.
Everyone has a little Show Troll in them. She is wild, crazy and always unpredictable.
The Show Troll will spend gratuitous amounts of money on sequined bras. A tornado of good times and some recreational drug use, she sucks up men as she moves along in life, spitting them out over houses and in fields. The female Hustler is ghetto fabulous.
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She is a better rapper than you without a doubt. She wears high-waisted jeans and a crop-top. Smokes that good pretty much everywhere she goes, she has no shyness in lighting a t as she exits the bar. Do not cheat on a Hustler unless you have a death wish. Our lady version of a Skibum, the Mountain Girl is down for whatever.
Mountain Girls are low maintenance because they see the importance of getting to the slopes on time.
Home Featured. Tinderella, photo by Darian Simon. Metal Chicks, photo by Camille Breslin. The Hipster, photo by Roman Tafoya.
Bro Hoe, photo by Delmy Gooch. Hippy Chicks, photo by Jeremy Stephen.
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Gym Rat, photo by Delmy Gooch. Cowgirl, photo by Brent Andeck. Yogis, photo by Romeo Fernandez. Show Troll, photo by Eric Goitia. Hustler, photo by Romeo Fernandez. Mountain Girl, photo by Jackie Collins.